Question:
Should I give up my virginity at the age of 14 even though I feel that I’m not ready to have sex? I’m really afraid about getting HIV/AIDS and getting pregnant at an early age. However I love my boyfriend very much and don’t want to lose him
Answer:
This is a common situation many teens face. Your reasons of not wanting to have sex shows that you’re a smart and mature young girl
When the question about sex arise there are a few important aspects to think about:
- You are in charge of your body and your happiness
- Sex is very intimate. It is not just physical thing but it is emotional too
- It is normal for teens to have strong sexual feelings, but it doesn’t always mean you have to act on them.
- Sex is only part of a relationship. Other important things like trust, mutual respect and caring needs to be in place too
- Even though your friends may advise you on what you should do, ultimately the final decision is yours
- It is best to discuss these issues with an older adult that you can trust
- You should wait until you are sure you are The best time is after marriage.
- You have to consider all the consequences that can happen i.e getting pregnant and being a young mom, sexually transmitted disease and facing your parents and the society if you make a wrong decision. Many young girls are afraid to inform their parents when they get pregnant
- Do not let other people’s values affect your decision.
- Do not be afraid to lose your boyfriend if he doesn’t want to be with you after you say No. He doesn’t seem to care about you and your feelings. He isnt worth it. If your boyfriend truly cares about you, he wont pressure you to do something you arent ready for.
There are lots of teenager who aren’t rushing to have sex. They are confident enough to say “No” In this way, they earn more respect from their peers and adults. They also usually have a better relationship.
You can always talk to a trusted person for advise. You can talk to your:
- Parents
- Older siblings, aunties, uncles
- Teachers
- Doctors
- Counselors
- Any trusted adult
- Responsible friend
References:
